....it tolls for thee, butthead." Once upon a time before Roseanne Barr - or whatever she calls herself now - went nuts, she had a very funny sitcom on TV. It was a realistic program about a middle class family where the parents were always working to make ends meet, the kids were a pain in the neck, and the people wore jeans and sweatshirts. This blog is not about Roseanne; however that quote is from the show, something Roseanne said to her TV husband, Dan.
I believe the original line is from a poem (minus the "butthead" part) and refers to a person's inevitable demise. In this case, the demise is of a reality show and a family, not just a single person.
Yes, I am back on my Jon and Kate Plus 8 rant. I know I have wasted 2 blogs on these idiots, not to mention time and energy. They have just really hit a nerve with me. Apparently, on the season premiere of their reality show this past week, they were interviewed separately (usually it's together) and Kate spoke of the fact that they may be heading for separation. She is crying, saying "it's not what she wanted or envisioned for her family." Hmmmm...am I supposed to feel bad for her?
This woman and her husband decided to bring 8 kids into this world. I have no judgement on this (well I do, but it's not my business). They then decided to allow TV cameras 24-hour access to their home, their marriage, and their kids. As if the stress of raising 8 kids isn't enough, these fools decided to add more stress to their lives by having it filmed and blasted all over TV. I have one question for Jon and Kate: How stupid are you? Did you think this was a good idea? Oh wait, let me guess; the promise of making lots of money, becoming famous, getting all kinds of free perks (including vacations and plastic surgery for Mom) overshadowed the thought of what was best for your family.
I am not a perfect parent, nor am I am perfect person. But, honestly now, you couldn't see this coming? Jon "quit" his job 2 years ago to stay home with the 8 kids, who, by the way, are always screaming. Maybe it's the constant TV lighting in their faces. Kate, meanwhile, decided to write books and has been "gone a lot", traveling to promote whatever she's fooled people into thinking is worthwhile reading. Hmmm, dumb Dad alone with 8 kids, self-absorbed Mom gone, TV cameras all over...why I believe that's we call a recipe for disaster! Add to this the fact that Jon is about as smart and personable as a fence post, and Kate is an over controlling squawker. Sounds like heaven to me!
I have no sympathy for Jon and Kate. They made poor choices - choices a 6th grader probably would have predicated were bad - and they are now paying the price. I do feel bad for their children, who will pay the ultimate price: the loss of their family as they now know it. Maybe in the long run it's for the best. Maybe whatever damage has been done can be repaired and these poor kids can live a normal life, a life out of the spotlight.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Hot Fun in the Summa-time
Well I have spent enough time and energy ranting about Jon and Kate, and as the kids say, "I am soooo done with them."
Both my legs are covered in mosquito bites, which means summer is officially here. Summer brings a multitude of things, including shorts, sleeveless shirts, and (insert shudder) the bathing suit. I enjoyed summer more as a young adult; after all, it meant no school, parties at the beach, suntans, and just plain old fun. Plus I was a size 6 and looked pretty good in a bikini.
Fast forward about 25 years: I am a stay-at-home Mom with no days off, we don't get to the beach very often, I have to wear sunscreen for fear of skin cancer, and I wouldn't wear a bikini if you paid me. Like most things in life, summer for me has changed drastically. First of all, we live in a rural area; we own 2.7 acres of land, most of which is woods. There is also a "wetlands" on our property, aka, a swamp. We live next door to a golf course with a lot of ponds, which means we have lots of mosquitoes. I am a mosquito magnet. Scientists have never been able to explain why mosquitoes are attracted to some people more than others, but they are. (Don't question my mosquito credentials...I have them.) So, if I want to be outside I need to covered in OFF insect repellent. Even this does not completely protect me and I get huge bites, which drive me crazy. As a result I spend the entire summer smelling of DEET and calamine lotion. Not like the old days when I smelled like Estee Lauder perfume and fruity hair conditioner. Being covered in bug bites is not comfortable. Neither is the rash i get from touching plants. That's right, plants. Any plant. I have no idea why, but I get a rash from plants. So if I do any gardening I need to wear gloves. Sometimes thick socks too to protect my legs. This is so attractive.
Another thing I find uncomfortable is being hot. I HATE being hot. Nothing can be gained from it. All it does is make me perspire, which makes my sunscreen, DEET and calamine lotion all run, thus requiring them all to be reapplied. The only way I like to be outside if I am next to a pool and can roll in like a lazy seal if I get too hot. I love being outside if the temperature is moderate, as in below 83 degrees. Any hotter than that and you will find me inside in the air conditioning.
All this leads to feelings of guilt. (I am Catholic so all things eventually lead to feelings of guilt.) I feel guilty because I should be outside in the beautiful sunshine. And often I am, I am just not enjoying it because I am hot and itchy. Plus nice weather always makes me feel like I should be doing something. Anything. Flying a kite, running through the ocean, playing at the park, or riding a bike. Laying down on the couch and napping in the sun like my cat is just not as satisfying in the summer. There's no blanket to snuggle under, and, again, I feel guilty for wasting a nice day just lying around.
I also don't like sleeping in the summer. Again this is a heat issue. I like my flannel pajamas and my cozy comforters. Since we installed central AC (by the way, a very worthwhile investment), this is not as much of a problem as it used to be.
Don't get me wrong; I enjoy cooking outdoors, summer parties, having my daughter home from school, and just the carefree attitude of summer. I just have come to realize that, strange as it sounds, I am a winter person. Actually, I love fall and spring, what little we have of them now. It's 98 degrees until the end of September these days, and then it seems fall is about 2 weeks long. Same with spring; it can be snowing here in New England as late as April, we have a few moderate days, and then the heat begins.
I realize it's a waste of time to complain about the weather. The one place on Earth that has perfect weather is San Francisco, where I spent 8 years. I will leave it at that, since if even discuss moving there again both my parents will instantly die of a stroke. (Don't worry, Mom and Dad, I'm not going anywhere.)
Both my legs are covered in mosquito bites, which means summer is officially here. Summer brings a multitude of things, including shorts, sleeveless shirts, and (insert shudder) the bathing suit. I enjoyed summer more as a young adult; after all, it meant no school, parties at the beach, suntans, and just plain old fun. Plus I was a size 6 and looked pretty good in a bikini.
Fast forward about 25 years: I am a stay-at-home Mom with no days off, we don't get to the beach very often, I have to wear sunscreen for fear of skin cancer, and I wouldn't wear a bikini if you paid me. Like most things in life, summer for me has changed drastically. First of all, we live in a rural area; we own 2.7 acres of land, most of which is woods. There is also a "wetlands" on our property, aka, a swamp. We live next door to a golf course with a lot of ponds, which means we have lots of mosquitoes. I am a mosquito magnet. Scientists have never been able to explain why mosquitoes are attracted to some people more than others, but they are. (Don't question my mosquito credentials...I have them.) So, if I want to be outside I need to covered in OFF insect repellent. Even this does not completely protect me and I get huge bites, which drive me crazy. As a result I spend the entire summer smelling of DEET and calamine lotion. Not like the old days when I smelled like Estee Lauder perfume and fruity hair conditioner. Being covered in bug bites is not comfortable. Neither is the rash i get from touching plants. That's right, plants. Any plant. I have no idea why, but I get a rash from plants. So if I do any gardening I need to wear gloves. Sometimes thick socks too to protect my legs. This is so attractive.
Another thing I find uncomfortable is being hot. I HATE being hot. Nothing can be gained from it. All it does is make me perspire, which makes my sunscreen, DEET and calamine lotion all run, thus requiring them all to be reapplied. The only way I like to be outside if I am next to a pool and can roll in like a lazy seal if I get too hot. I love being outside if the temperature is moderate, as in below 83 degrees. Any hotter than that and you will find me inside in the air conditioning.
All this leads to feelings of guilt. (I am Catholic so all things eventually lead to feelings of guilt.) I feel guilty because I should be outside in the beautiful sunshine. And often I am, I am just not enjoying it because I am hot and itchy. Plus nice weather always makes me feel like I should be doing something. Anything. Flying a kite, running through the ocean, playing at the park, or riding a bike. Laying down on the couch and napping in the sun like my cat is just not as satisfying in the summer. There's no blanket to snuggle under, and, again, I feel guilty for wasting a nice day just lying around.
I also don't like sleeping in the summer. Again this is a heat issue. I like my flannel pajamas and my cozy comforters. Since we installed central AC (by the way, a very worthwhile investment), this is not as much of a problem as it used to be.
Don't get me wrong; I enjoy cooking outdoors, summer parties, having my daughter home from school, and just the carefree attitude of summer. I just have come to realize that, strange as it sounds, I am a winter person. Actually, I love fall and spring, what little we have of them now. It's 98 degrees until the end of September these days, and then it seems fall is about 2 weeks long. Same with spring; it can be snowing here in New England as late as April, we have a few moderate days, and then the heat begins.
I realize it's a waste of time to complain about the weather. The one place on Earth that has perfect weather is San Francisco, where I spent 8 years. I will leave it at that, since if even discuss moving there again both my parents will instantly die of a stroke. (Don't worry, Mom and Dad, I'm not going anywhere.)
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Ava, Laura and Malcolm - And Then Some
Well knock me over with a feather... A few weeks ago I posted a blog ranting about a TV show that follows the lives of a couple and their 8 children: a set of twins, and a set of sextuplets. (See blog dated and titled April 19, Stupid Is As Stupid Does.) Little did I know how an appropriate title that would be.
I will not go back into the details of this rant. Read it if you really want to know. Let's just say that the male involved in this reality mess has been caught "hanging out with a 23-year-old teacher". According to both the husband and the teacher, "they are just friends." Oh wait! There goes the turnip truck off of which we just all fell. (That sounds awkward, but my education will not allow me to end a sentence with a preposition.)
Let's examine this situation, shall we? A 32-year old man - the father of 8 children, star of a reality show thru which his whole life is exploited on TV - is photographed in a bar in the company of some college girls and this 23-year old woman. This man is dumb as a post, overtired, henpecked, and immature, and yet we are to believe had the discretion to tell these women, who are fawning all over him, "Sorry ladies, I'm taken." We are also to believe that this man who is continuously criticized (and not without reason) by his overly controlling, OCD, witch-of-a-wife on national TV is not going to be tempted at the thought of a young woman wanting him. Call me cynical, but I think he cheated.
I also happen to think it's a riot. I guess I shouldn't be happy at someone else's misery. However, as I stated in my first rant on this subject, these people have no one to blame but themselves for their situation. No one held a gun to their heads and forced them to have the in-vitro procedures that resulted in the 8 kids...and certainly no one forced them to then capitalize on this this by then blasting their private lives all over TV.
The wife is now on tour promoting her second book. That's right...she wrote one book, PEOPLE READ IT, and now she's written another. How a woman who has 8 kids finds time to write 2 books I'll never know. I have one child and I barely have time to write a grocery list (and this blog for my 3 fans). I also read today that this woman gets paid $50,000 to $75,000 per episode of her reality show. WHAT???? I assume her husband Romeo gets paid his own salary, which he's obviously squandering on booze and women (although not a bad way to squander money necessarily). So these 2 fools are making millions of dollars while the rest of us - who don't have TV cameras in our house 24/7 - are just working for a living. Unreal.
Perhaps I should write a pilot for my own reality show about a mother who has a child with rare craniofacial syndrome. Cameras could follow us everywhere: through dozens of surgeries, doctors appointments, countless hours of worry, oodles of sleepless nights, hours of research, etc.
I am sure it's not as glamorous as a couple with 8 kids, but who cares? As long as we make money, that's what counts. And all I have to do is what I - and millions of other women - do everyday. We just have to do it while all of America watches, judges, and then laughs when the perfect family turns out to be not so perfect after all.
I will not go back into the details of this rant. Read it if you really want to know. Let's just say that the male involved in this reality mess has been caught "hanging out with a 23-year-old teacher". According to both the husband and the teacher, "they are just friends." Oh wait! There goes the turnip truck off of which we just all fell. (That sounds awkward, but my education will not allow me to end a sentence with a preposition.)
Let's examine this situation, shall we? A 32-year old man - the father of 8 children, star of a reality show thru which his whole life is exploited on TV - is photographed in a bar in the company of some college girls and this 23-year old woman. This man is dumb as a post, overtired, henpecked, and immature, and yet we are to believe had the discretion to tell these women, who are fawning all over him, "Sorry ladies, I'm taken." We are also to believe that this man who is continuously criticized (and not without reason) by his overly controlling, OCD, witch-of-a-wife on national TV is not going to be tempted at the thought of a young woman wanting him. Call me cynical, but I think he cheated.
I also happen to think it's a riot. I guess I shouldn't be happy at someone else's misery. However, as I stated in my first rant on this subject, these people have no one to blame but themselves for their situation. No one held a gun to their heads and forced them to have the in-vitro procedures that resulted in the 8 kids...and certainly no one forced them to then capitalize on this this by then blasting their private lives all over TV.
The wife is now on tour promoting her second book. That's right...she wrote one book, PEOPLE READ IT, and now she's written another. How a woman who has 8 kids finds time to write 2 books I'll never know. I have one child and I barely have time to write a grocery list (and this blog for my 3 fans). I also read today that this woman gets paid $50,000 to $75,000 per episode of her reality show. WHAT???? I assume her husband Romeo gets paid his own salary, which he's obviously squandering on booze and women (although not a bad way to squander money necessarily). So these 2 fools are making millions of dollars while the rest of us - who don't have TV cameras in our house 24/7 - are just working for a living. Unreal.
Perhaps I should write a pilot for my own reality show about a mother who has a child with rare craniofacial syndrome. Cameras could follow us everywhere: through dozens of surgeries, doctors appointments, countless hours of worry, oodles of sleepless nights, hours of research, etc.
I am sure it's not as glamorous as a couple with 8 kids, but who cares? As long as we make money, that's what counts. And all I have to do is what I - and millions of other women - do everyday. We just have to do it while all of America watches, judges, and then laughs when the perfect family turns out to be not so perfect after all.
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