Christmas Letter

Dear Friends and Family,

The holidays are upon us, and once again we've been kind enough to write down everything we did this year, so you can read it with envy. We don't want you to miss a detail!

I'd start with January, except I don't remember any of it. February brought the 5th birthday of our daughter Ava. Because we are out of our minds, we decided to host a children's party for 10 of Ava's little pals at a local kid's museum. Thank God all the parents stayed or I would have lost at least half the children. Once that was done we all went home and got drunk.

March was completely non-descript except I think Easter was thrown in there somewhere. I am sure something happened in April, although I can't recall what it was.

In May we were thrilled that Ava got to have eye surgery and an airway assessment. Our doctor said that since Ava was such a complex case we should go to Cincinnati Children's Hospital for a complete airway assessment, because they are the experts in kids with complex airways. Needless to say, we were thrilled at the thought of visiting yet another hospital and with the added bonus of flying there as well!

In June we decided to take out first plane ride with Ava to a family weekend for craniofacial kids in Myrtle Beach. After spending 12 hours packing our clothing, and cramming all our toiletries, countless medical supplies, and other necessities into 4-ounce containers - and then cramming the 4-ounce containers into quart size plastic bags - I was ready to schlep all our crap to the airport and get on a plane. Ava loved the plane ride and we all enjoyed the vacation, despite the fact that it was hot as blazes and everything cost a million dollars.

July brought my 41st birthday -yipee- I think Malcolm and I may have gone out to dinner, but I don't really remember. All I can tell you is I likely fell asleep by 10pm. also I now need reading glasses on top of my contact lenses for "age related eye problems. "

In August we celebrated 9 years of wedded bliss as well as Malcolm's 43rd birthday. Ava started kindergarten too. As we expected, she is at the top of her class and excels academically. Now if she could sit still during story time we'd be fine. She also dabbles in the martial arts at her twice-weekly karate classes. I am sure she is gifted in this area and we'll likely be celebrating her black belt soon. While the instructor says she can be "unfocused", I view this as such as negative term, and prefer to call her inquisitive and engaging.

Finally, in October we took our dream vacation to Cincinnati, OH, where we spent 5 nights in a cut-rate room - an old hospital room converted to a hotel suite. It wasn't quite as nice as the Ritz but we made the best of it. All I can say is thank God there was a Marriott with an excellent bar across the street or I might not have made it through the week.

Autumn also brought pumpkins, beautiful foliage and the news that Malcolm has high blood pressure. Just another hurdle for us, as he is now taking daily medication for this condition. I continue to take the fist full of anti-anxiety and anti-depressant drugs I need to make it through the day.

This Thanksgiving was much better than last since we spent it with family instead of in the hospital. We look forward to doing the same at Christmas; we hope that we are all healthy.

Day to day life remains the same. Malcolm toils away at his job as an engineer, while I engage in such glamorous activities as grocery shopping, laundry, feeding the cat, cooking, and cleaning every few months. I do get out every chance I get and have had several good hangovers this year due to my tendency to drink like a fish whenever I can escape the monotony of being a housewife. I also joined a gym this year and despite working out 2 hours a week have not lost one pound. But muscle weighs more than fat, you know. What a crock.

All I know is we have survived another year. We had our ups and downs, and like everyone else, had our fun and our struggles. We are glad that Ava enjoys school. We don't care if she is the smartest or the slowest, as long as she learns and is happy. We are grateful that we have employment and a roof over our heads. We don't care to compare vacation notes, home improvement projects, our children's crowning achievements, or any other petty details. We do hope that you take a moment to look around you and realize that there are other people in the world besides you. And those people don't really give a rat's ass what you did all year.

Happy Holidays! Love The Whiners