Hot Fun in the Summa-time

Well I have spent enough time and energy ranting about Jon and Kate, and as the kids say, "I am soooo done with them."


Both my legs are covered in mosquito bites, which means summer is officially here. Summer brings a multitude of things, including shorts, sleeveless shirts, and (insert shudder) the bathing suit. I enjoyed summer more as a young adult; after all, it meant no school, parties at the beach, suntans, and just plain old fun. Plus I was a size 6 and looked pretty good in a bikini.


Fast forward about 25 years: I am a stay-at-home Mom with no days off, we don't get to the beach very often, I have to wear sunscreen for fear of skin cancer, and I wouldn't wear a bikini if you paid me. Like most things in life, summer for me has changed drastically. First of all, we live in a rural area; we own 2.7 acres of land, most of which is woods. There is also a "wetlands" on our property, aka, a swamp. We live next door to a golf course with a lot of ponds, which means we have lots of mosquitoes. I am a mosquito magnet. Scientists have never been able to explain why mosquitoes are attracted to some people more than others, but they are. (Don't question my mosquito credentials...I have them.) So, if I want to be outside I need to covered in OFF insect repellent. Even this does not completely protect me and I get huge bites, which drive me crazy. As a result I spend the entire summer smelling of DEET and calamine lotion. Not like the old days when I smelled like Estee Lauder perfume and fruity hair conditioner. Being covered in bug bites is not comfortable. Neither is the rash i get from touching plants. That's right, plants. Any plant. I have no idea why, but I get a rash from plants. So if I do any gardening I need to wear gloves. Sometimes thick socks too to protect my legs. This is so attractive.


Another thing I find uncomfortable is being hot. I HATE being hot. Nothing can be gained from it. All it does is make me perspire, which makes my sunscreen, DEET and calamine lotion all run, thus requiring them all to be reapplied. The only way I like to be outside if I am next to a pool and can roll in like a lazy seal if I get too hot. I love being outside if the temperature is moderate, as in below 83 degrees. Any hotter than that and you will find me inside in the air conditioning.


All this leads to feelings of guilt. (I am Catholic so all things eventually lead to feelings of guilt.) I feel guilty because I should be outside in the beautiful sunshine. And often I am, I am just not enjoying it because I am hot and itchy. Plus nice weather always makes me feel like I should be doing something. Anything. Flying a kite, running through the ocean, playing at the park, or riding a bike. Laying down on the couch and napping in the sun like my cat is just not as satisfying in the summer. There's no blanket to snuggle under, and, again, I feel guilty for wasting a nice day just lying around.


I also don't like sleeping in the summer. Again this is a heat issue. I like my flannel pajamas and my cozy comforters. Since we installed central AC (by the way, a very worthwhile investment), this is not as much of a problem as it used to be.


Don't get me wrong; I enjoy cooking outdoors, summer parties, having my daughter home from school, and just the carefree attitude of summer. I just have come to realize that, strange as it sounds, I am a winter person. Actually, I love fall and spring, what little we have of them now. It's 98 degrees until the end of September these days, and then it seems fall is about 2 weeks long. Same with spring; it can be snowing here in New England as late as April, we have a few moderate days, and then the heat begins.

I realize it's a waste of time to complain about the weather. The one place on Earth that has perfect weather is San Francisco, where I spent 8 years. I will leave it at that, since if even discuss moving there again both my parents will instantly die of a stroke. (Don't worry, Mom and Dad, I'm not going anywhere.)