Well July 4th is here. For some strange reason, there aren't many fireworks on July 4 itself here in CT. Most of them are the weekend before, the day before, the week after. Who knows why. CT has some strange laws. For example, fireworks are legal, but you can't buy alcohol on Sunday. This must date back to some Puritan code that dictated that alcohol was the Devil's Drink. I guess God was OK with explosives.
I've heard only one firecracker today, a sharp contrast to yesteryear, when the idiot who lived across from me as a child would spend the whole day and night setting them off. I learned a good many swear words from my father as he cursed this kid, who was making just a heap of noise all day. I remember as a young adult going with a boyfriend to his friend's house for July 4. This friend had a last name that just so happened to be the same as several famous Mafia members, and the boatload of illegal fireworks he assembled on July 4 was confirmation of his obvious "connections." He would start by setting off the pretty ones and then end the night basically setting the whole street on fire. I remember one year, the noise was so loud, it somehow tripped some electronic device in my boyfriend's car, and the car would not start. I have no clue how we got home, but we obviously made it.
Today was an interesting July 4. The weather was OK, which means it didn't rain continuously, as it has for the past 40 days and 40 nights. My daughter won a Perfect Attendance award at her karate class this past week, so we decided to let her pick a place she'd like to go. She chose the park with 3 playscapes and a sprinkler park. She put on her little bathing suit and played happily in the sprinkler for about 15 minutes. Then she got cold and played on the playground. We ate the picnic lunch we brought. All of a sudden she decided she wanted to go home and was being quite a brat about it. (We had been there a total of 45 minutes.) We told her that it was too nice to go home and watch TV, and she proceeded to throw a huge screaming fit. After several minutes of this we told her firmly that if we left, we were not going home, but were going to do a "Mommy and Daddy" thing instead. "I DON"T WANT TO DO A MOMMY AND DADDY THING I WANT TO GO HOME!" After threatening to take away all TV privileges for the day, she quieted down and we stopped at a local winery, since any "Mommy and Daddy thing" required a drink by that time. She behaved perfectly there, of course. The person pouring the wine even commented on how well behaved she was, and I swear that my daughter gave me the finger. Only my child would be happier at a winery than at a playground.
Next we did go home and she watched one hour of TV and then we shut it off and played in the backyard. She swung on her swing, jumped in her bouncy house and ate shrimp cocktail (she's 6, but acts like she's 40). My husband and I had a few beers and barbecued, and all was OK.
Sometimes I feel sorry for myself. My little girl has a lot of medical needs, and this sometimes interferes with her ability to either do things other kids can do easily, or just makes it harder for her; thus, it makes things harder for her parents. I know all kids have meltdowns and are uncooperative; but other parents can sit back and not worry if their child's airway will get plugged. Other parents don't need to worry if their child is screaming because they're being a normal kid, or is the shunt that diverts excess cerebral spinal fluid from her brain clogged? Most parents just feed their kid; they don't need to count calories to make sure they're eating enough to make up for a tube feeding.
And then I come out of my little pity party and watch my daughter swinging and laughing on her little swing, something she couldn't - and wouldn't- do 2 years ago. She says "Thank you, Daddy, for making my playground nice." (Daddy put down nice, soft rubber mulch under her playground last weekend.) I think of our little family of 3 and how much we all love each other. And then things are OK again. Things will never be perfect, I know that. I am just grateful life has given me the chance to realize that perfection is not necessary; what we have is wonderful. Happy July 4th everyone.
2 comments:
I often along with my wife have pity parties. You know what, you are right, no one could know like you do the lose. So every once in a while, have a good old fashioned pity party, then get on with it. Nice blog.
As long as Miss Ava is moving foward as well as she is, an occasional bout of misbehavior is bearable. Can't wait to see you all next week.
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